The real problem with Jessica Seinfeld's cookbook

So, I am in Barnes and Noble, or as my family refers to it, My real home, and I spy a cute-as-a button cook book. I love cook books, and by several new ones a year. I am not capable of passing by one that looks even slightly interesting. This one was definitely interesting. It had kind of a retro 50's look to it, with an old fashioned looking drawing of young woman, hair up in a perky pony-tail, winking at the viewer as she held some sort of platter or plate. I picked it up and browsed quickly through it. I realized very quickly it was one of those gimmick cook books to get kids to eat disguised vegetables. So not for me. I don't have time to make box brownies right now, there is no way in hell I am gonna whip up a batch from scratch just so I can throw some spinach in them. I put the book back and continued my shopping without much more thought about it.

After B&N I went to Costco. Why, yes, I did go through the book department. Sure enough, there was Miss Saucy Pony Tail and her tray of I'm guessing slightly slimy brownies.

"That's odd," I thought. B&N and Costco almost never push the same cook-books. Still, didn't think much of it. When I saw the book at my grocery store, my brow crinkled a little. Being an aspiring author myself, I really admired her marketing department.

When I came home from the gallivanting, I put away all my stuff and watched Oprah, or as I like to call her, "The black Dina Lohan". Guess who was Oprah's featured guest? Jessica Seinfeld. Why Jessica Seinfeld? Well, it turns out, Jessica Seinfeld wrote the cute cook-book.

Hmmm....who knew? I settled in to watch it, and found my self agreeing with some of what she said about kids resistance to eating vegetables. A lot of what she said makes sense. And she is just as cute as her cook book. I can totally see why Jerry Seinfeld left that fourteen year old he was dating to take Jessica away from the guy she was married to while she was on her honeymoon. Any way, the whole thing was kind of cute. I was a little dubious about this Jewish American Princess being down in the trenches every night feeding her kids. I started to buy it though when she relayed her peaceful Sunday nights, catching up with Jerry while she steamed her veggies and turned them into puree. I could picture the scene of urban domesticity. I pictured a mostly white well lit kitchen, with Jerry on the other side of an expansive counter, as they talked about the triumphs and challenges of their prospective weeks.

"See," I told myself, "The rich are just like us, except for the wife stealing and borderline pedophilia." I was happy about this in a weird sort of way. Something about the triumph of maternal will over materialistic trappings. I was happy to think of her taking responsibility of her children's meals, not just picking them, but the actual act of cooking it. I was surprised because most mothers I know would hire a chef to at least help out with the cooking, if not take it over completely, if they could afford it. This includes me, and I love to cook.

I was buying it, like I said, until a couple of days later, when Oprah showed the audience Jessica Seinfeld's 'Thank You'. Twenty-one pairs of shoes. Twenty-one pairs of very expensive, high end shoes. That just blew the whole facade wide open. No woman who can afford a Forty-two shoe thank you is going to risk her three hundred dollar blow-out steaming vegetables for her kids, when she can afford to buy someone to do it for her. No, I didn't mean pay someone. So what's the point? Jerry Seinfeld got paid, um....682 trillion dollars for the syndication of 'Seinfeld', and he still does stand-up most weekends. He had that gig with American Express, and now he is in a kid's movie. I mean, I'm pretty sure she's not thinking about going back to work to ease up a little of the financial pressure on him. I am also pretty sure she doesn't even know where her kitchen is. There is nothing that rings true about Jessica Seinfeld sneaking veggies into her kids food. Maybe they are a close knit family, maybe they even eat together, but I can not imagine that they are eating food prepared by the sweat of Jessica's pretty unlined brow. I applaud her self-promotion, and at least it is something useful, and potentially good, rather than potentially harmful, (Please note, Britney Spears' mother is writing a parenting book.) I just wonder why. I have to admit, I wish I did believe it, but I don't. Apparently she has a great cook, and a caring one. One who cares enough to sneak vegetables into her kids food.